138. Second Chances, Healing After Pet Loss & Finding the Perfect Family Pet

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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Pets Add Life, your guide to the latest in pet trends, products, and the joy of the human animal bond with Kristen Levine and me, Chris Bonafati, powered by the American Pet Products Association and Dog TV. Hello and welcome to another episode of Pets Ad Life. I am one of your co-hosts Chris Bonafati, and joining me as always is a bacon, egg, and cheese, salt, pepper, ketchup, Kristen Levine.

Speaker 2 (00:27):
Well, that sounds yummy.

Speaker 1 (00:29):
Kristen, what's your go-to deli order breakfast sandwich?

Speaker 2 (00:33):
Breakfast sandwich? Well, at Starbucks, I get the feta, what's it called? Spinach feta wrap.

Speaker 1 (00:43):
Yeah. I'm a bacon, egg, and cheese, hash brown, hot sauce kind of guy. And if they have good bagels, I like it on a bagel. Otherwise, the hard

Speaker 2 (00:54):
World. Yeah, it depends on what kind of bread they're putting it on. If it's an English muffin or a bagel or a croissant or whatever.

Speaker 1 (01:02):
And I feel like when I'm outside of the New York metro area, my order changes because you just can't... Other places just don't know what they're doing with the bacon. And it's so simple. It's the most simple thing and for some reason they mess it up. So I usually go with a sausage, egg, and cheese when I'm outside of the New York metro area.

Speaker 2 (01:21):
Well, what do you mean? What does the New York Metro area do right about bacon that nobody else does? Well, because

Speaker 1 (01:27):
It's so popular that they make it all in advance and they cook it really crispy. At these other places, it's not as popular, so they don't cook as much of it and they don't do as much prep. So you get the rubbery bacon that

Speaker 2 (01:39):
Pulls

Speaker 1 (01:39):
Out of the sandwich. And that's the worst.That ruins my day. If I bite into a bacon, egg, and cheese and I pull out an entire strip of bacon, my day is growing. That's gross. Yeah. It's terrible. It's terrible.

Speaker 2 (01:52):
Yeah. Anyway. Okay. This is not a breakfast podcast. Welcome to Breakfast

Speaker 1 (01:55):
Dad's Life. Can you tell we're hungry?

Speaker 2 (01:59):
Exactly.

Speaker 1 (02:02):
This is a pet parenting podcast where we're going to do the same thing as always.

Speaker 3 (02:08):
Kristen and Chris present Story Time.

Speaker 1 (02:13):
All right, Kristen, story time. You are teasing yours out, so now I got to hear it. I've waited long enough.

Speaker 2 (02:20):
Okay. Well, this is just an unbelievable reunion story. I mean, we hear them periodically and they're always just amazing, but I found this one incredible. Okay. So Evanston, Illinois, 12 years ago, a woman named Vanessa Antonio was going through a really tough time in her life. She was actually living in her car with her best friend, Flor, who was a chihuahua. Now, somehow Flor got out of the car and vanished and was only four years old at the time. Fast forward to just this last August, Flor was found as a stray in Gary, Indiana, it's about 30 miles from where she disappeared. And her microchip was registered, but the phone number on file had not been updated in over ever, I guess. So there's a group, I've never heard of this group, they're called Microchip Hunters. They're a volunteer group devoted to tracing outdated dead end chips.

(03:19):
That's basically when your microchip and your pet either was never registered, which unfortunately commonly happens, or it was registered when you got the dog or cat, but when you moved, you never updated it. So they somehow connected the dots and they found Vanessa's current information and a volunteer drove Flor the Chihuahua now, I guess 16 years old, from Indiana to an Evanston shelter. And they were reunited along with Vanessa's four kids. Now she has four kids. And these kids got to hear stories about Flor as they were growing up because she used to tell them about her first baby. So I just think that's such an incredible reunion story and obviously a great reminder to our listeners to make sure that your dog or cat's microchip is A, registered in the first place, and B, if you've moved since you got your pet, that you update that information.

Speaker 1 (04:17):
That's awesome. I want to join the micro chip hunters. I feel like that's the closest I'll ever get to being Batman. You know what I mean?

Speaker 2 (04:24):
I feel like that could be a reality show.

Speaker 1 (04:27):
Yeah. And honestly, that's actually... A, didn't realize that's a thing. B, is a kind of cool way to do detective work and be helpful without having to be police.

Speaker 2 (04:41):
Yeah, exactly. Exactly. Hey, maybe we can book them as a guest on the show.

Speaker 1 (04:45):
That'd be fun.

Speaker 2 (04:46):
Microchip hunters. All right, Chris, how about your story this -

Speaker 1 (04:50):
Okay. I've got one for all my Swifties out there and I'm not a big Taylor Swift either protractor or detractor or anything. I really don't keep up with Taylor, but I got to tell you how this story was pitched to me because every now and again, I ask my coworkers if they have any stories that they have for Pal. It can be tough to come up with a lot of ideas for the show. So sometimes I actually used to outsource that. And the way this one was pitched to me, and I'm not going to blow up my coworker spot and name them. Oh, come on. No, I'm not going to do it. Maybe in private, I'll tell you who it was because you do know them, was that Travis and Taylor are hard launching their dog in a Tommy Hilfiger campaign, hard launching their dog.

(05:41):
That's right. They have gotten a dog together as young married couples do. Is it pronounced Samoy? Those big white...

Speaker 2 (05:50):
Samoyan, yeah.

Speaker 1 (05:51):
Yeah, Samoyed. Yeah, beautiful dog. The link's in the thing. I don't care for Taylor and Travis, but you got to see the dog people, beautiful dog. Named Wendy, fun fact, named after Travis's childhood crush, Wendy from the Sandlot, the lifeguard girl from The Sandlot. So a little fun fact there. I already know way too much about this, just always so many details in these celebrity stories. Anyway, the dog is making her onscreen debut along Travis Kelce and Tommy Hilfiger's new Only in New York fall campaign being shot at the Plaza Hotel in New York City. So Tommy Hilfiger's used dogs plenty of times and they were doing a shoot. Let's see who else was in it. It's Gigi Hadid Yiso, who's I think a K-pop person, Peggy Gow and Carmelo Anthony, so some New York icons there. And they were also shooting Travis and Taylor.

(06:52):
And this isn't the first time Taylor's pets have been modeling. You may remember her cat, Olivia Benson, and you know that when there's two names to a cat, a proper lady, did a Keds ad and her other cat, Meredith Gray, which is so funny that she has a cat named Meredith Gray, was in a direct TV commercial and her third cat, Benjamin Button, made the cover of Time Magazine in 2023. So pets really are... Sure, this is a weird story, but I do feel like these are just times where pets are being brought out to the forefront. It's so interesting to me that people care so much about their favorite celebrity's pet. That was not really a thing 20 years ago, right? And the pets being including Marshall's part of their story.

Speaker 2 (07:54):
Yeah, from the celebrity standpoint, I mean it's a great way to connect even deeper with your fans or maybe attract new fans.

Speaker 1 (08:03):
So anyway, congratulations, Wendy.

Speaker 2 (08:07):
I wonder if Wendy has a separate agent or if Taylor Swift's agent handles the pets too. That's interesting.

Speaker 1 (08:17):
That's a really interesting question.

Speaker 2 (08:19):
Fun fact.

Speaker 1 (08:20):
I feel like whoever Taylor Swift's agent is probably has so much power that they could represent this cup of coffee. You know what I mean? And get it booked. I feel like her agent could probably handle the dog, but who knows? Who knows? Maybe Wendy's a bit of a diva and requires independence. Yeah. Hopefully they set up a trust in Wendy's name so that when she turns 18, she'll have access to the money she's making.

Speaker 2 (08:47):
Well, thanks for bringing some Swifty news to the Pal Podcast.

Speaker 1 (08:51):
Anything for the fans.

Speaker 3 (08:52):
Beyond the leash, exploring the untold stories of pet passion and professionalism. Well,

Speaker 2 (08:56):
I'm excited for you to meet our special guest next who has spent more than a decade helping some of the dogs who need a second chance the most. Jess Borda has been involved with Austin Pets Alive since 2012. She's been working hands-on with shelter dogs as a volunteer trainer and advocate, and she has a particular passion for dogs who may need a little more time, more training, or more support before finding their forever home. Now, over the years, Jess has worked with dogs facing behavioral challenges, helped support long-stay shelter dogs, trained and mentored other volunteers, and helped introduce adaptable dogs to the Austin community. She was also one of the volunteers who cared for a really special senior dog named Opie. After being diagnosed with terminal cancer, Opie was given only weeks to live, but ultimately spent another eight months surrounded by people who loved her.

(09:51):
Her story helped inspire Austin Pets Alive's hospice program. I've never heard of that. I'm excited to talk to her about this, but this is a program that places terminally ill dogs in foster homes so their final chapter can be spent in comfort and love rather than in a shelter environment. Jess, welcome to Pets Ad Life.

Speaker 4 (10:11):
Hi. Thanks so much for having me.

Speaker 2 (10:13):
It is a pleasure to have you. And I'll just kick it off by asking you, so you've been with Austin Pets Alive, I had said since 2012, that's like 14 years. That's incredible. Do you remember a particular dog or a particular moment that pulled you into this work?

Speaker 4 (10:31):
There's actually two dogs that when you ask that question that come instantly to mind. In the first year that I was at Austin Pets Alive, one dog's name was Billy and he was probably like a two-year-old pit bull, brindle, white stripes, a dog that I've probably never seen in my life before starting to volunteer, just very unique. And they kept moving his kennel. So I'm like, "Is he adopted? No." So you just keep coming back to make sure that that dog's journey is continuing. And then there was a senior dog named Snoopy who's a black and white Border Collie. And I grew up with Border Collie, so he really drew me in and he was one of the first dogs that I'm like, "Maybe I will adopt a dog." But luckily he found a lovely home and the person I still remember sitting with her as she's filling out the adoption paperwork saying that you got a really good dog named Snoopy.

Speaker 1 (11:22):
That's great. I remember the cat litter I saw in a shelter when I was a kid that got me obsessed with cats. I still remember their names. They were locked shock and barrel from Nightmare Before Christmas. Those are the names of the three little kids there and I could still see them in my head. I'm happy that you have such a vivid memory of those early pets and you were so invested in their lives and it led to eventually Austin Pets Alive and you really specialize, and I love this about you, taking chances on animals who may have limited options. What's that like behind the scenes? It's obviously a bigger lift. It's obviously much more difficult, but can you describe a little bit about that extra work and care that goes into your program to make this happen for the dogs?

Speaker 4 (12:11):
Absolutely. I think one of the best parts about Austin Pets Alive is everyone gets to have some sort of ownership of the roles that they play at Austin Pets Alive, whether a volunteer or a staff member or a new staff member or a established staff member. And so you get to kind of pick and choose how you want to contribute. And Austin Pets Alive is part of Austin, the community, a big part of the no kill ethic of the city where we are the largest no kill city in the nation currently because of the work we do. And we work really closely with the city shelter and take most of their medical cases and a lot of their behavioral cases. And behavioral is a wide spectrum, of course. Sometimes it can be as low level as they're a little reactive versus kennel stress versus they actually...

(13:06):
Some event has occurred that makes them harder to place in the community for a city entity. So as a nonprofit, Austin Pets Alive is able to take those dogs into our care and do an evaluation period. While there's not a formal tick off the boxes, we have twice a day playgroup to evaluate any dog's social ability and to work dogs through their social ability. So if they're a little bit nervous or uncomfortable around dogs, we have that time and space to actually do some behavior modification to do work with them on that. So behaviorally, we're able to get all of our dogs out twice a day, whether that's to playgroup or to walks because of the community of volunteers and staff members that know how important that is. And we're able to evaluate those dogs and then work with them in the shelter. So we have a once a week class where volunteers can come and just teach some of the basics like sitting down, coming when called, things like that.

(14:04):
And then we have another level of volunteer and staff that are able to do those a little bit more meaty working on eye contact and their dog's reactions and emotional reactions to their stimuli. And then post-adoption, or if a dog moves to foster, we have a dog behavior follow-up program and we offer free lifetime behavior support for all of our dogs.

Speaker 1 (14:28):
That's amazing.

Speaker 2 (14:29):
That's great.

Speaker 4 (14:29):
Yeah. And that's also a part of my volunteer programming that I do. So I do a lot of emails and it can be as simple as I have a puppy that's eight weeks old and he's biting me. And it gets complicated as my dog got out of the yard and an event happened and I'm not sure if I can keep that dog or not. And another thing that we highly support is returns. So if something happens, we will always take our dogs back, even if that's a moving out of the country or some other big event is happening with them. We're not a no questions asked. We ask lots of questions, but

(15:07):
We want to support our adopters and our fosters and sometimes the best thing we can do for them is to bring the dog back into our care. I think that that's a really important component because there's a lot of forever home, forever home. And it's like, well, maybe it's just this time period home. So supporting our adopters and our fosters through those hard times too, and maybe giving them the support that they need to keep their dogs. So it's a wide spectrum of the things that we need to do to get dogs into homes and keep dogs into homes.

Speaker 2 (15:38):
Sure, sure. Jess, why is it that some dogs, some really wonderful dogs end up waiting several months and sometimes even longer to find their forever home while other dogs get adopted rather quickly?

Speaker 4 (15:53):
It's such a good question. It's something that I contemplate all the time. Our length of stay ranges from two days, and we have a dog in our care that's been with us for 3,300 days total. Oh, wow. Yeah. He's been in and out of our care. He has been adopted. He has the worst luck, but he does have challenges. A dog like that does have a challenge, but we also know that there's somebody out there for them. There's like 15 people because he's been placed 15 different times. But sometimes I think a dog can get a reputation of who they were when they came in on day 30, and then that reputation kind of follows them even if they're not the same dog by day 400. So I try really hard to help internally and in the world to help people understand that dogs can change just like people can.

(16:50):
I love bringing dogs home for sleepovers, especially they've been in the shelter and haven't had a break. I'm like, actually, their shelter behavior doesn't necessarily look like that.

(17:02):
We do pull some medical cases into our care and that can be expensive for people and they hesitate to take on those medical cares when we can cover those cares as a nonprofit. I have a couple of long stay dogs in Foster that they just have ongoing medical care and as they get into their senior life, that makes it a little bit more challenging, even though they're great with people, they're great with other dogs, the medical component can definitely be a part of that. For Austin Pets Alive, we probably average about between 500 and 600 dogs in our care at any given point. So just the sheer quantity of like, "Well, these dogs look kind of the same, so this one has been here longer, this one hasn't been as long." So I think that sometimes you get a little decision fatigue.

Speaker 2 (17:56):
I was just going to say we're coming up on time, but I want to give you a chance to tell our listeners and our viewers where we can get more information, whether we're interested in adopting or we're interested in the FOSS program or your foster program.

Speaker 4 (18:11):
Absolutely. We're austinpetsalive.org. Our website is very robust, so you can search for adoptable animals or you can search how to volunteer or how to foster. We have tons of fostering opportunities, especially for dogs. You can take a dog for a weekend, you can take a dog for two weeks, you can take a dog before they're leaving for transport, you can take a dog, a medical dog, and you get the full support of our medical team and our clinic, and all that's paid for by the organization. As a volunteer, you can come and walk dogs, take care of cats, clean kennels, do dishes, do laundry. There's no end to the amount of things that you can volunteer at.

Speaker 1 (18:49):
Lots of tasks.

Speaker 4 (18:50):
Something

Speaker 1 (18:51):
For everyone.

Speaker 4 (18:52):
It's the never ending tasks. We have great volunteer program where we train our volunteers up how to handle our dogs at different levels. We still have a kennel space, which is really exciting, and we always need that help with our volunteers, but visit us at austinpetsallive.org. We'd love to have adopters and fosters. We don't do a lot of out-of-state direct adoptions, but we do have a robust transport program. So the likelihood of finding a dog from Texas across the United States is very high, and we're happy to connect people with our partners.

Speaker 2 (19:29):
Well, and regardless of where you live, you can donate to Austin Pets Live. You

Speaker 4 (19:35):
Can, absolutely. And we supported Central Texas through flood response both this year and last year, not to mention in 2017, Hurricane Harvey and making Texas no kill for about 30 days with the amount of animals we supported. So we support our state as much as possible and mostly the dogs in our city shelters. So it's a great organization and I hope people come and check us out and learn more about us.

Speaker 2 (20:03):
Well, Jess, thank you. You've done a great job of explaining. There's probably even more that we didn't get to today. You guys, when you said you have a robust website, you're not kidding. I did check it out earlier. So thank you for your dedication to the animals and for being here today.

Speaker 4 (20:17):
Thank you so much for having me. I appreciate it.

Speaker 1 (20:22):
What a pure soul.

Speaker 2 (20:24):
Right?

Speaker 1 (20:25):
It's a good person.

Speaker 2 (20:26):
You can tell that Austin Pets Alive is just her life. She's so dedicated and energized by the work that they do, and we're so, so fortunate to have people like her that do this kind of work.

Speaker 1 (20:41):
Yeah. And shelters that do all of these different kinds of fostering options, there's such a intricate design and team and the logistics that go into making that possible, the screenings and the questionnaires and everything has to be managed by so many people just so that every now and again, a dog can get into a home for a weekend. I mean, it's a lot of lift to make a little bit of magic happen for animals. So I just think -

Speaker 2 (21:14):
I'm sorry to interrupt. I was just going to add that it costs a lot of money too. It does. Yeah. And if you're not a city or county run shelter, you exist on private donations. So that's why it's so important to support the animal shelters and rescues in your community. They depend on it.

Speaker 1 (21:30):
Absolutely. Couldn't have said it better myself. It's my pleasure to introduce our next guest who's written a beautiful reminder that sometimes animals who change our lives can continue leading us somewhere new even after they're gone. Matthew Sigman is an award-winning writer and editor and a three time recipient of the ASCAP Deems Taylor Award for Music Journalism. His writing has appeared in publications, including Symphony, Opera News and American Theater and on NPR's performance today, but his newest book tells a much more personal story. Matthew shared 18 years with his beloved... 18 years. Wow. Beloved dog Auggie. When Augie died, Matthew was obviously devastated and it came at a time where other parts of his life seemed to be falling apart as well. Heartbroken and searching for an escape, he impulsively left New York for Europe. Through an accidental discovery on an Airbnb map, that journey brought him to Karna.

(22:32):
We're going to hear it from the horses about the tiny mountain village in Northern Italy where an unexpected friendship and the warmth of an entire community helped him begin to find his way forward. So Matthew, first of all, thank you for taking some time out of your day to talk to us about this story. It sounds absolutely like... I mean, there's a reason you wrote a book about it. It sounds like it came out of a book.

Speaker 5 (22:57):
Thank you. It's a privilege to be here. And yes, it has a storybook quality that, let's just say, when I sat down, it was not the book I expected to write.

Speaker 1 (23:08):
Sure. Yeah.

Speaker 5 (23:10):
It's the book that came out of a long process of journaling and writing and suddenly it shaped itself.

Speaker 1 (23:17):
That's amazing. And I want to start by talking about Augie. 18 years is a long time to have a dog, and obviously losing a companion like that can be very difficult, but I want our listeners to know who was Augie and what made that relationship between the two of you so special?

Speaker 5 (23:36):
Augie was a shepherd cottly mix who I adopted from the Humane Society of New York. Back in those days, there were no internet portals for finding strays or rescue dogs. In a city, you had to go with the local talent, as I like to say. You had to find dogs that had been rescued within the city or the region, and you had to shop with your feet. You had to go to this rescue organization and this one and this one and the city shelters. But at the Humane Society, through a long process, they have a wonderful behaviorist on site, a volunteer named William Berloney, and Bill is most famous as an animal trainer and behaviorist for film, television, and Broadway. He discovered... Oh my goodness. Why am I blanking on the name? The dog who appears in Annie, the musical. Help me here.

Speaker 2 (24:30):
Oh,

Speaker 1 (24:32):
This is a question.

Speaker 2 (24:33):
We're all drawing a blank.

Speaker 5 (24:34):
We're all drawing a blank here. Sandy. Oh my goodness. Sandy, the most famous Broadway dog ever. Bill identified Sandy in a shelter and helped train him to become the kind of dog whose Broadway role probably saved a lot of other strays, all the road company productions and returns of Annie to the theater. Anyway, Bill gave me sort of a interview. It was more intense than any psychotherapist could possibly do. Do you consider yourself a calm person? Not really. No toy breeds. No toy breeds for you. Do you consider yourself an athletic person? No sporting breeds for you. Anyway, he pretty much suggested that a shepherd collie mix would be ideal for me. They train easily. They interact very easily in the city. And it took a while, but eventually I got the phone call that a litter had come and instantly, I know it sounds like a cliche, but I lifted each pup and I talked to each pup and I watched them behave and unquestionably Auggie was a match from the beginning.

(25:45):
There is a hormone, I believe it's called oxytocin. It's known as the love hormone, and it's part of the human interactive bonding experience. Well, whatever his oxytocin and my oxytocin, it was right there. What I found most intriguing about him is that unlike the other dogs who were kind of scattered, he was focused. Immediately, you could see his curiosity and his engagement with the world around him. He was just so eager to play with the kittens and play with the other dogs and meet people. So it was that presence, charisma, and the wonderful assistance of the humane society that brought me to Augie.

Speaker 2 (26:26):
Aw, that's great. So can you tell us a little bit, Matthew, about what your life with Augie was like? Obviously, you described him in the shelter and that's how you chose him, but I know it's tough to sum up 18 years in one answer, but what kind of rituals did you have together? What was your life like together?

Speaker 5 (26:46):
Well, the thing to keep in mind as we tell this story is that Augie and I spent most of our lives on the cockeye grid of the West Village in New York City. And if you don't know the West Village in New York City, most of the rest of the city is a grid that was established later, everything east, west, north, south. The West Village is this crazy, crazy thing of streets. Auggie and I walked those streets one, two, not one, three, four times a day for 18 years, with a few exceptions. We lived at the beach for a while, we lived in other places. I would summarize it by saying Augie and I were integrated into our community, the shopkeepers, the neighbors. We passed two or three times every single day. Symbiotic seems a little bit too excessive, but our lives were really joined.

(27:38):
Most of those years I was a bachelor. Halfway through those years I met my partner, but Augie was witness to my life. I'm sure other guests have perhaps told you this. A dog sees things that other people don't through all the various senses. So I was a bachelor most of those years. When I adopted Augie, I thought I was just going to be a guy with a dog. Hey, that's the dude with the dog.

(28:02):
It ended up being more like that. As I say in the book, there's things I didn't anticipate. One was you adopt the dog and you're an I, you come home from the shelter and all of a sudden you're a wee, you're a wee. And then the next thing is you become part of this community you never realize the community of people who like dogs and that community of people who have dogs, which in New York City is very important because if your dog doesn't get along with other dogs and you're walking along the street... So we really bonded because we were together walking every single day on the grid of our streets. And a human being going to the grocery store or the post office finds the shortest distance between two points, right? You take the way you know a dog doesn't go that way.

(28:56):
A dog follows his nose. So he takes you places you would never have gone before without him. So although I didn't let him pull ever, he trained very easily, I let him guide me. And he always took me down the street. I'd never gone down before because I wouldn't have thought to go that way.

Speaker 2 (29:18):
Yeah. Well, Matthew, we're coming up on time, but I want to give you a chance to kind of give us an overview of... The book is called Because of a Dog. Give us an overview about how it changed your life and helped you recover from your grief by getting away to this little unexpected town in Italy.

Speaker 5 (29:37):
Dorothy Day, the Catholic philosopher, would say, "The only solution to loss is love and the key to love is community." By bonding with this tiny little Italian community, I was a fish out of water, it helped me sort of regrow the capacity to Bond with community. So I was able to come back to New York and rebond with my partner and rebond with my neighborhood and then start writing this book. I had a wonderful agent who advocated and helped shape the story and place it with Sourcebooks. I'm very grateful to Sourcebooks for also my editor there, Anna, helped shape the story. And so it slowly became the story of overcoming grief and discovery. And then ultimately it became a story of escape, discovery and renewal. And so the reason the title is there is people kept saying, "Well, how did you discover Quarana?" And it's like, "Well, because of a dog." Exactly.

(30:44):
That's amazing. So Augie shaped this story from the beginning and I didn't even know it. Wow. In life, he took me to places I hadn't discovered. And even in his death, he took me to places I hadn't discovered.

Speaker 1 (30:56):
I think that's really what pets do for us. They sort of take us out of our day-to-day. They take us out of our own heads, out of our own ego and make us experience the world through a different lens. And I think it's fantastic that you had A, such a great relationship with your dog and had 18 years to enjoy that relationship. And even in passing, Auggie had one more lesson for you. And I think that's absolutely amazing.

Speaker 2 (31:26):
Yeah. And I think this story can help anyone heal from grief of really any kind. Like you said, the solution is love and community. So where can we find your book?

Speaker 5 (31:41):
Well, because of a dog, how an enchanted Italian village mended a broken heart, can be found in most major bookstores and/or through your local independent bookstore, and can also be found on all major online retailers. So you can order it today or you can go into your bookstore today. And I have to tell you, even though I've been a writer most of my adult life and a journalist, to hold a book in your hand and to see it on the shelf in a bookstore, it's a privilege, especially for relatively late in life author than mine, as I am. What I would say to your viewers is let heartbreak just help you discover things. Don't stay inside. It's okay to sort of discover and explore. And as far as publishing the book late in life, I also say to people now, you two included, you can still be a rock star.

Speaker 1 (32:42):
Yeah. I love that. Matthew - You

Speaker 5 (32:45):
Can still be a rockstar.

Speaker 1 (32:47):
I appreciate all these kind words and the life lessons. I'm excited to check out the book myself. I'll definitely be picking up a copy and we appreciate you taking some time today, Matthew. Thank you very, very much. And maybe when you write the follow-up story, a second book, we'll have you back on the show.

Speaker 5 (33:06):
Thank you very much. It's really been a privilege to be here. I appreciate it.

Speaker 2 (33:14):
I've decided to bring back something that I used to do all the time and I haven't done it in a few years, but I do pet book recommendations around the holidays. So I just jotted down because of a dog to include on that list.

Speaker 1 (33:27):
It's right up my wife's alley. A little tiny Italian town about reconnecting with yourself and community and she'd gobble that up. She loves little Italian rumps. So maybe it'll be an early Christmas gift or I don't really need an excuse to buy my wife something.

Speaker 2 (33:52):
That's true.

Speaker 1 (33:53):
Just a thing for her.

Speaker 2 (33:55):
What a good husband. The product of the week.

Speaker 1 (33:59):
It is time for our product of the week and I poked my eye on the tree while grabbing a cord. The tree has betrayed me. So Kristen, I'm going to kick it over to you and Tulip. What do you got for us?

Speaker 2 (34:15):
Okay. Okay. Okay. So it is Sweta Weather, right? Sweater Weather. And if you are watching us on YouTube, you see Tulip wearing her fall sweater and she's very happy to be doing so. It's adorable. I know. So I got this sweater on Etsy five years ago and we bring it out every October and I just think she looks adorable in it. And when we take her places, she gets so many compliments on it. So my product of the week is an adorable fall sweater for your dog. And I'm going to put her down because she's not too happy with me right now. So I went to Etsy and there's tons and tons of great fall sweaters, but this particular one has little pumpkins on it. You can get it in, I think it comes in orange with little pumpkins or you can get it in this teal color with little pumpkins.

(35:09):
The store is called Lenucia Store on Etsy. It's a five star rated small shop. The sweaters are around 50 bucks. They're handmade and they're the vest style. If you don't like pumpkins, you can also get little bumblebees or popcorn or ladybugs or carrots embroidered on there. So super cute. They're made from merino, wool, cotton and acrylic. And this store in particular makes sweaters for smaller sized dogs and you can also personalize them, like put their name on them or something like that. But if you have a larger dog or a medium sized dog, just go to Etsy and search fall sweaters for large dogs and you will have plenty, plenty to choose from. And I think this is a fun one to highlight because it supports an independent maker for seasonal products. So check that out on Etsy and get your dog dialed in for fall.

Speaker 1 (36:03):
Tulip looks so horrible.

Speaker 2 (36:05):
All right. Is your product of the week as cute as mine?

Speaker 1 (36:09):
No, it is not. I failed to live up to the cute expectations. We're doing fancy cat litter today. We're doing fancy cat litter. And this is one that I saw half a year ago at Global Pet Expo and I never got around to talking about it because I was sort of saving it in my back pocket for an appropriate episode where plugin well and then it never came up. So I was like, all right, smoke them if you got them. It's a great product. We should get it on the show. And it's the Lady N pellet litter. And it kind of combines two things that I really, really like. The first is it's made from tofu. So it's like a sustainable ingredient and it's dust free. As somebody who's always had cats his life, me and my vacuum are best friends. I'm constantly vacuuming the air around the box and then the cat tracks it into other rooms, then it gets into carpeting.

(37:09):
This kind of material, the pellets, it's almost like what you use for small animal bedding where it's going to kind of stay together and it's less of a clumping litter and more of a catchy litter. I don't really know the verb to describe it. Anyone who's used these litters would know what I mean. But here's the - If

Speaker 2 (37:28):
You know you know.

Speaker 1 (37:30):
Yeah. If you know your game, you know. They have an exclusive pheromone formula that is supposed to help de-stress your cat. So this is an expensive litter. This is a luxury litter, but it's especially good if you have an anxious cat who you are struggling to keep using the box consistently, especially if you're going to be having a lot of people over or you just have one of those lives where routine doesn't really work out that well for you or you just have an overly anxious cat who's not using the box properly. The pheromones are primarily used to help cats relax and live a more comfortable, happier life. It's a natural way to soothe and calm your cat, reducing their stress related behaviors. So this is a nice Wombo combo of if you have that anxious cat and you don't want to try and force supplements down its gullet.

(38:22):
And if you do the toppers, it doesn't eat its food and you're trying to just add something to their life to add a little calmness. This is an expensive litter. They offer a subscription series where you can kind of get it for one subscription box is four bags. I don't really know the size of their bag, but it is $94 a subscription box. A bag is about, it looks like nine pounds. And now I'm kind of reading off the picture. So depending on how many cats you have and how big your cat is, I would say that's probably a solid month, month and a half worth, but check it out. I think it's a good two for one if you're struggling with other ideas or other options to alleviate some anxiety symptoms in your cat.

Speaker 2 (39:08):
Ooh, that's an innovative one. I mean, pheromones in the litter, smart.

Speaker 1 (39:11):
Yeah, yeah, exactly. It's somewhere you know the cat's going to be. It's somewhere where generally speaking, their olfactory nerves and stuff are going to be working, stinky. But hey, I believe it's just ladyn.com, ladyenpet.com. It'll be in the notes. Check it out.

Speaker 4 (39:31):
Yes.

Speaker 1 (39:33):
Q&As. All right folks, it is time for our favorite part of the show. That's right. We're going to answer two questions from our lovely audience. And lovely audience, I know what you're thinking. How do I have my question answered by Kristen Kristen? Well, it couldn't be easier. Head on over to petsadlife.org/podcast. Scroll on down to the bottom of that page and you will see the form to submit your question. Or if you're feeling as brave as a fake tree poking your favorite cohost's eye out, you can record a voice memo and you may hear your question played live on the air. All right. What do we have today, Kristen? What do we got?

Speaker 2 (40:14):
All right. I've got a question for you from Jennifer and Jennifer is in Boston. Okay. Thanks for your question, Jennifer. She asks, "My cat can be incredibly sweet and then suddenly she'll swat, scratch, or even bite me with what seems like no warning. Is she just a feisty cat or could this behavior be her way of telling me she's stressed, overstimulated, or uncomfortable?"

Speaker 1 (40:40):
That's a good question, Jennifer. And I think you actually managed to name the answer in your question. That's an overstimulated cat, straight up. And you said seemingly no signs, there's always signs. They're just super subtle with some cats. I don't know if you've ever seen a cat sort of do this where they go from purring and then they just sort of look down the barrel. That eye contact, that's a cat saying you're done. And some cats will go from that to, if you don't respect eye contact, you get claw contact. So another thing to look for, this is something my old cat Gizmo would do, the big main coot I used to have growing up. He loved getting the top of his back scratched, like near his butt, near his tail, but you would actually see it when he was done, the hair on his back raise.

(41:42):
When cats get down and hiss, how their hair raises, and that would be the only signal you got before he would turn around and grab onto you to get you to stop. So something subtle is that. Cats may not make a noise. Some cats aren't going to be gentle first. If you don't get the subtle hint they try to drop, some cats it's claws out right away.

(42:07):
One thing you can definitely do to help alleviate a cat who may be experiencing overstimulation is ensure they have enough enrichment and getting that exercise will make those play sessions with you feel less stressful, less overstimulating because they're more used to activity as well as making sure there's enough scratching posts in around. So if this is more of like a, oh, this is a good chance for me to use my claws, give your cat areas around the house where they can safely use their claws in case this is just like a claw thing. But I think overstimulation, Jennifer, good luck. And no, your cat isn't mean or anxious. Your cat's just catty.

Speaker 2 (42:47):
Yeah. As a cat parent, you really have to master the art of recognizing super subtle signs.

Speaker 1 (42:53):
Yeah. Reading between

Speaker 2 (42:54):
The lines. Because like you said, there's always a sign. It's just not always very obvious.

Speaker 1 (42:58):
Yep.

Speaker 2 (42:59):
All right. What you got for me?

Speaker 1 (43:00):
Number one is from Rachel in Denver. Thank you

Speaker 2 (43:03):
Rachel

Speaker 1 (43:03):
For your question. Rachel asks, "We're thinking about adopting a dog, but we have two young kids and this would be our first family dog. That's so exciting. When we visit a shelter, what should we look for to find a dog whose personality and energy level will actually be a good fit for our family?" This is a great question and congratulations

Speaker 2 (43:21):
Rachel. Oh, I love this questions. Yes. And Rachel, I'm so delighted that you're going to adopt a dog. That's wonderful. First of all, the very first thing I would say, you say you have young children, so I just want to make sure you're really clear on the fact that despite how the kids might be telling you they'll take care of this pet, it will be you. You will be doing basically 100% of the work, maybe not in week one or week two, but definitely after week three. So besides, depending on the age of your children, they may not have the ability to really meet all the dog's needs. So anyway, that said, that's my disclaimer. First, I would do a little bit of research and thinking about what kind of dog is going to be best for your family. And I'm not necessarily talking about breed because at the animal shelter, you're going to find some purebreds, but probably mostly mixed breeds.

(44:07):
So do you want a small dog, a medium dog, a large dog? Do you want a breed mix that has more energy or is easy to train? Or obviously you want a dog and a dog breed mix that tends to do really well with children. So think about that first. So you kind of have a general idea of what you do want or don't want when you go into the shelter. And then I would say take the whole family and the kids and everybody into the shelter for just a really calm kind of meet and greet. Don't go in with the intention of walking out with a dog because it might not happen on day one. So go in there and usually they have volunteers at shelters that will take a dog out of its kennel to a play yard or something so that you can get to know their personality.

(44:55):
And keep in mind when you're looking at dogs in the kennel, remember that the behavior they exhibit inside of a shelter like a run or a kennel is not necessarily a preview of what their actual personality is like. So it's really important that a volunteer help you get that dog to a room or a play yard where you can spend time alone with that dog just to get to know them better. One of the things we used to tell people when I worked at a shelter is to watch for the recovery time between a startle. If your kids make quick movements, does the dog startle or is it bombproof? It just doesn't really react. If it startles, but then it chills out again, that's a really good sign. If it startles and then continues to stay kind of nervous and anxious, that's probably not a good fit.

(45:47):
We also want to ask the shelter staff what they know about the dog. They work with these dogs every day, so they probably know which dogs would be good with kids. And oftentimes the dog will choose you. You go in thinking you're going to pick a dog and sometimes the dog picks you and quite often it's something that you hadn't even though about, but that's why it's important to be thoughtful about what you need versus what you don't need when you do enter the shelter. So best of luck and I hope you'll follow up and let us know who you adopted.

Speaker 1 (46:19):
Yes. Send pics, please.

Speaker 2 (46:22):
We love that. All

Speaker 1 (46:24):
Right. That brings us to the end of our show, middle of October. Time flies. Love

Speaker 2 (46:33):
It. Favorite month. But it's going way too fast.

Speaker 1 (46:36):
Favorite month, October?

Speaker 2 (46:38):
Oh gosh. Yeah. I love the fall.

Speaker 1 (46:40):
You know what? That's a good pick. I doubted it at first and then I really thought about it and I was like, October's excellent. October's a great pick. And we're getting close to Halloween. We are now flip-flopping all over with the Halloween costumes ideas. Oh

Speaker 2 (46:53):
No.

Speaker 1 (46:54):
We were so committed early on in the game and now that we're getting close to it, there's a lot of flip-flopping. Changing it up. Yeah, there's a lot. We keep seeing new costumes in the stores and going, "Wouldn't that be cute?" Grayson may be Madonna. He may have like four other things. You know what I mean? Anyway, we hope

Speaker 2 (47:13):
That - Wh happened to the big chicken or whatever that big yellow thing was that he fell in love with?

Speaker 1 (47:18):
Oh, it's at home. It was the big Halloween duck that is dressed as a cat for Halloween. Yes. It is in his play area and he snuggles with it to drink his bottles and it's the most adorable thing.

Speaker 2 (47:32):
Well, good

Speaker 1 (47:33):
Luck with costume

Speaker 2 (47:34):
Search.

Speaker 1 (47:35):
Yes. And to all of you, have a safe and happy rest of your week. We'll be back here next Tuesday. Make sure you're checking us out on YouTube, Dog TV Unleashed and all the other wonderful platforms, break review, subscribe and share. We'll see you next week. Pets Ad Life, your guide to the latest in pet trends, products, and the joy of the human animal bond with Kristen Levine and me, Chris Bonafati, powered by the American Pet Products Association and Dog TV.